Memo to Human Resources

But Tomorrow Everything Could Change

2007-03-18T05:37:54Z

About a month ago, I wrote and recorded a demo for a song called Paint It Red. It didn't really have a chorus, but it rather repeated the same five verses three times. The point of the song was that no matter how hard you try, life doesn't really change.

Well, I guess I was wrong.

Things are going great in my life right now, quite a shock for any regular readers of this blog. After many false starts and a pile of money spent on dating web sites, I met a girl who seems quite interested in me. Makes me upset I spent so much on those fruitless websites, but I'm happy with everything that's going on.

I'm not going to say much lest I jinx it, but everything is going far better than I could have ever expected. It's good to be back in the game...

I Don't Need to Wear This Shirt

2007-01-07T05:18:23Z

The Jimmy Carter Experience, my brother's band, had a gig tonight. I was standing around during the openers, and the singer actually singled me out and told everyone how great my T-shirt was (a Mr. Show shirt)... Embarassingly, I was not paying attention at the time. My friends had to tell me that I was part of the show! After that, I thought I should have been the focus of every band... alas, I was not.

I am a Human Head

2006-10-22T08:06:51Z

Every year, my parents host a halloween party for my friends and me. It isn't your standard costume party at all, and it actually focuses another Halloween tradition: the Jack-O-Lantern. Each year, the works become more and more creative, and in recent years, we've even voted on which was the best.

I actually came up with 2 ideas this year. The first, I called the Jacko-Lantern. This would have been a white pumpkin made up to look like Michael Jackson. This pumpkin would be looking happily to the side at a trio of smaller pumpkins with scared looks on their drawn on faces. However, when I went to the local Halloween store, when I asked if they had any Michael Jackson gloves, the only response I recieved was "What kind of glove is that?" That made me feel pretty old...

My other idea, which I went with, was the "Punk-in." I gave the face a bit of a sneer and its eyebrows turned downward. On top was a mohawk wig I bought at Target, I added a chain that went from the "nose" [read: triangle] to the "ear" [read: side]. Finally, I wrapped a yard of plaid fabric around the base and stuck a bunch of safety pins in him ("eyebrow", etc). If you want to see it, I've got it up on my myspace page right now...

The competition was extremely fierce this year. Entries included: a Picasso inspired jumbled face; the words "EAT ME" written 360 degrees around the pumpkin; an iPod; a drawn & quartered pumpkin; a pumpkin that shot Silly String... However, the top three were:

3. a representation of the "Rock!" hand sign (pointer and pinkie up, the rest folded in)

2. a carving of a pumpkin carving into human

And number one? Well, did you really think I would go to all of the trouble to type this up if I had lost? yay, I won!

In His Mind, There Is No Other Game

2006-09-08T04:10:23Z

Last April when I went to Italy, I wrote the following:

"...there's a call-in show where you try to guess words starting with An... It costs 50 cents a call and the prize winners are few and far between, but it's somehow mesmerizing"

Well, months later, it has hit our shores (albeit at 99 cents a call instead of .5 Euros). While innocently channel surfing a few nights ago, I found that TBS started running a call-in show of this nature to fill their midnight-2 am slot (which is, ironically, about the same time as the European versions air). And I, unfortunately, find it just as mesmerizing.

The games are bit more simplistic [yeah, I know, more simplistic than "words that start with An..."...? hard to believe], so they don't go on quite as long. However, the other night, one game went on so long that the hostess was adding $50 for every wrong guess... Started at $300, but there was $1000 in the pot before someone guessed it (and I'm glad I didn't call because my guess was wrong wrong wrong)

The first night that this show was on, there were no callers. I kinda wanted to play out of pity. But, alas, I didn't and now the show has enough rubes to subsain itself...

Who's Knockin' on the Wall?

2006-09-02T04:59:18Z

so by now, you all know of my insane plan to travel 1460+ miles for concerts this Fall. Well, guess what, I'm adding another show. I've fallen in love with Tilly And The Wall. They're a group out of Omaha and their main bass section is an amplified tap dancer. This is the eclectic stuff I love. Why didn't anyone alert me when they were playing in Cincy a year ago (when I didn't know who they were) versus the Nashville show I have to go to now?

Grassroots Internet Revolution

2006-08-26T13:15:28Z

I hate hate HATE the new yahoo.com. On the old version of the page, they'd have prominent news stories, but now it's all garbage. Here are the four stories that Yahoo now thinks are important to me:

Meet Mark Wahlberg's 'Invincible' inspiration - oh! so I can see the inspiration for a shitty movie? Thanks!

Emmy Red Carpet Fashion Flashback - c'mon, fashion changes so quickly, why would I care about last seasons dresses?

Nerd, Geek, and Dork: What's the Difference: Someone should tell Yahoo that the second comma isn't needed. Which catgegory do I fall into for correcting your grammar mistakes, Yahoo?

and finally: See a Speedy T-Shirt Folding Technique: huh? because the normal way took so long previously?

A Thousand Times

2006-08-24T03:07:47Z

Lately I've been posting movie related stuff to my myspace blog -- mostly just the reviews I write for the Georgetown newspaper -- but I thought this was interesting enough to cross-post. Oh, and if you haven't already, subscribe to my myspace blog so you can tell me how much my taste in movies sucks:

I've been saving my movie ticket stubs for about 15 years now, and some years after that, I started coounting them. After a recent count, I noticed that I was nearing my 1000th stub, so I thought I'd share some statistics with everyone (Note: some of the early stubs were missing and thus not counted, but my records for the later years are pretty much dead on):

Total movies recorded: 1000

Movie #1: The Rocketeer, 6/22/91 (of course not the first I ever saw, but they first one I have record of)

100: The Cable Guy, 6/14/96

500: American Psycho, 4/18/00

750: American Splendor, 9/14/03

1000: V for Vendetta, 8/23/06

Published reviews: 107 (Georgetown News-Graphic)

Most in one year: 127 (1998)

Most in one month: 18 (12/2000)

Busiest month: December (average 10.09 movies)

Least busy month: March (average 5.08 movies)

100+ years: 1997, 1998, 1999, 2004

Most Visited Theater: Woodhill (20.1%)

Private Screenings (had the theater to myself): 3 (Paulie, Pushing Tin, A Walk on the Moon)

Solo Flights (went w/o friend/date/etc): 65.8%

Silent Movies: 1 (Broken Blossoms)

Multiple Times: Chasing Amy, Rocky Horror Pictures Show, What About Bob (all 3 times)

Christmas movies: Mansfield Park, Kinsey

Birthday Movies: Hot Shots, Clear & Present Danger, Species, Spawn, Bullwinkle, Strangers With Candy

The Lovely Music

2006-08-20T04:26:28Z

Well, late summer/early fall is shaping up to be a mighty strong period for concerts. Here's the rundown:

-On August 10th, on a whim, I drove up to Cincy to see MAE. I only have one of their albums and I don't know it well enough to sing all of the lyrics, but I thought it might be fun to see them live. I was right. Very solid performance, and since they played my 2 favorite songs as the encore, they had a very strong finish. I could have waited to see them in Lexington, but then I would have to miss...

-The Features, who are playing the same night. I've seen these guys 2 times already, but this will be the first time that I can sing along. This is a fun band, and I highly recommend that everyone pick up their first album, Exhibit A. If you can find it. I had to buy it when I saw them open for Fountains of Wayne last year.

-Nellie McKay in September. Sure, Nashville is 3.5 hours away, but this is so worth it. Her first album is nothing less than brilliant, and her second (unreleased) isn't far behind. Almost no one has heard of her, but she's definately one to check out...

-The Dresden Dolls in October. This time, I'll be travelling to Knoxville. I'll probably be the only non-Goth guy there, but I love this duo. It's powerful, angsty music.

Those are the ones that I've bought tickets for already, there's still some others that I'm on the fence about. The Mountain Goats, which I don't know a whole lot about other than the one album I have, are playing in Athens, OH (3.75 hours away), so that sounds interesting. Also, Jenny Lewis is going to be in Detroit, MI (5.5 hours away). If it was Jenny's main band, Rilo Kiley, I'd totally be there, but since it's her solo stuff, it's a toss up. What to do, what to do?

...And Now You're Even Older..

2006-08-05T06:29:56Z

Happy birthday to me, I guess...

Theme to Flood

2006-07-29T03:12:37Z

Recently, our roommate Chad decided that he was going to move in with his girlfriend. Considering that we've rarely seen him in the last 8 or so months, this really wasn't much of a lifestyle change for my brother and me. As he started emptying his overly cluttered room, he started noticing a bit of a smell and the fact that his feet were getting wet. Well, it seems that the air conditioning was leaking into his room and since he hadn't been there in so long, the smell wasn't allowed out until he started stirring things around. And boy did it smell! Kinda like a pool that hadn't been attended to in a long, long time.

So, we take measures to combat this and the smell starts to dissipate and the room is dry.

Then, one day, my dad comes over to work on out garden. He, unfortunately, gets distracted before he leaves and forgets to turn off the hose. Because of the way the pipes are set up, all of the pressure is built up and refloods the room, as well as my room in the process. So, the war is now on two fronts! We were eventually victorious, but for a time, I was afraid I might have to resign myself to living in a world akin to Venice which I visited last Spring...

I Read My Book

2006-07-09T05:30:15Z

ah, yes, this is a great feeling -- I just saw my first 4* movie of 2006. An Inconvenient Truth and Pirates of the Caribbean were both fun, but I'm so glad that I ventured out on Saturday night to see Tristam Shandy: A Cock & Bull Story. Very "meta," but I like that kind of thing... Makes me want to read the original novel, but I'll probably never get around to it (that's a joke. Do a little research, you'll get it...)

How Can I Sing Like A Girl?

2006-07-05T03:48:08Z

My friend Anna told me today that I am "infallible" when it comes to picking girl-centered rock music acts. Who knew that that was where my talents lie?

On the Streets of Boston

2006-07-04T07:56:02Z

So, I must blog about my trip this last week. Here goes!

Thursday: Wake up the same time I usually get up [9 am], and get ready to go. about 3 minutes before we're about to drive out to Louisville, I get a call from our airline telling us that our flight has been delayed. Fun. We soldier on anyway. Turns out, our flight has been so delayed that we are going to miss our connecting flight. We catch a later flight, which is troubling because we have $130 tickets to see the Red Sox that night. We end up landing at about 6:50, a scant 15 minutes before the game. Me meet my pal Joe at the station a scant 10 minutes before the start of the game. We got there fairly quickly, and even get to see some inning 1 action.

Friday: Joe has to work, so we [my brother and I] sleep around for awhile, despite sweat inducing tempratures (sorry, Joe, you guys live in a sauna!). He comes back for lunch and drops us off in Lowell, MA. We entertain ourselves with coffee, mexican food, the world's smallest Barnes & Nobles, and a local Irish pub. I pl ay Kelly Clarkson and Paris Hilton on the jukebox just to make the rest of the patrons uncomfortable. Jo0e comes back, and we head out to Boston. We hit the Freedom Trail, but most everything is closd, but then we find America's oldest tavern. We have acouple of drinks, then cross the street so Ben and Joe can slurp oysters (eww, I say). The last stop of the night is the bar that inspired Cheers. They make a mean Manhatten...

Saturday: Drive out to Boston and attend the Sam Adams brewery tour. free, and a good bit of free beer. Worth it in so many ways. Afterwards, enjyed the Commons a little more, but most of the rest of the evening was spent driving to CT. We drove through RI to get to an Indian Casino, Mohegan Sun, to see a band we all like, They Might Be Giants, give a free concert. We arrived mid-first-song, and our posistion in the crowd wasn't great [thank god for video screens], but it was still a fun show (with 5 songs I'd never seen live before!). Ben & Joe don't want to gamble, but I'm Gung Ho about it. After much hemming and hawing, I find a machine I like. my $20 quickly becomes $6. Oy. So, I leave and find another machine -- this time, I get 7 7 7, and am up to $42. woo! no more gambling tonight!

Sunday: Last day in the Northeast, decide to make it a good one. drive up to main, get a delicious Lobster Roll [yeah, I know, when in Maine, get a real lobster, but I didn't... suck it...]... Next, Mini Golf! I lose big time, but I still love the sport... then, the batting cage... I lose big time, and my thumb gets torn to shreds... ow!

But after that, we decide to find the Maine beachcoast. Amazing is the first word I'd say, cold is the second. Maine is just as hot as Kentucky, really, but just a tad less humid... After that, there was a flight that was delayed forever, a night at a Philly HoJo, a cool couple in the same predicament as us... We got home eventually...

I Mention Movies

2006-06-22T00:20:15Z

My life has become entirely too intertwined with my DVR. I keep telling it to record more things, and the only way to make sure that I have enough room for future recordings is watching and deleting what I've already recorded. So, right now, the machine sits about 1/2 full (it can hold up to 80 hours), and I generally have to watch 2 movies a day, which only get replaced by 3 overnight. I think this past weekend I watched something like 8 movies.

And they're not really even good movies, either. Most are run-of-the-mill garbage, and I'm too afraid to watch the real classics I've recorded (What if it turns out I don't like Raging Bull? what kind of movie fan would I be then???).

After 2 months, I ended my subscription with match.com. It was just too demoralizing to e-mail and get absolutely no response, added to all the obviously fake profiles that are in there from scam artists. I think the whole online dating thing has to work better for girls. I'm half tempted to set up a fake match.com page just to see how many unsolicited resonses it can get in the span of a month...

Sadly, The Cross-Eyed Bear

2006-06-14T06:59:38Z

My brother's band, The Jimmy Carter Experience, is playing at WKQQ's Decent Exposure thing tonight. They go on early, 9:00 pm. It should be a good show, if for no other reason than the band and I put together a rather surreal video to be shown on the screens at the Blue Moon... We kind of expect people to pay more attention to the video than the show...

I'm Sick, Like Chucky Was Sick

2006-06-03T04:49:16Z

We recently got a DVR through the cable company at my house, so I've been recording movies left and right off our digital movie package that we've barely been watching for the last 2 years. It's mostly a good tool to watch movies that I thought I was too good for 2 years ago (Wimbledon: turns out, not that bad of a romantic comedy; Finding Neverland: sentimental crap that turns on the pedophile-o-meter just a little [and, yes, I know that I disagree with a lot of people on that one])

Tonight, I watched The Gong Show Movie... Nothing spectacular, but I could tell that it was subversive for it's time, so I may make a copy anywey. Of course, it's nowhere as good as "Confessions of a Dangerous Mind, a "biography" of host Chuck Barris by genius director(!) George Clooney.

"Confessions" was only my 4th favorite movie of its year, but over time, I've wathed it more than any of the other favorite of the year (Solaris [director/actor of Confessions starred in this one, but too depressing to watch multiple times], Chicago (too gay too wqatch multiple times, haha), and Adaptation [same writer as Confessions]{I own all 4 on DVD}). If you've not seen any of the movies listed above, what are you waiting for? (except, maybe, the Gong Show Movie... You'll be ok without that...)

There's a common link between all four films. $1 to whoever finds the link first. :)

Pour the Poison in my Ear

2006-06-01T04:15:13Z

I absolutely love Slings & Arrows, a Canadian drama series that the Sundance Channel is rebroadcasting. Right now, the director of MacBeth is halucinating visions of a star director who has radically different opinions on the play. It's so good... Honestly, I'm guessing that I'm the only person in Kentucky who loves this show so much... (if you can prove otherwise, hook me up! haha)

Hell Hotel

2006-06-01T01:41:49Z

Little Known Fact #49: It is absolutely impossible to play a game of Monopoly without at least one player cheating... In other words, never leave your seat, even if it takes 14 hours...

They Got Lost

2006-05-25T04:18:32Z

Anecdote: About a week ago, during a fierce wind storm, our garbage can ran away. Sad, to be sure. We looked up and down the street for it, but it was gone. We mourned our loss and moved on...

But then, a day later, miraculously, our driveway had a trash can again! There is a God!

Ok, on to other matters:

Ok, first of all, doesn't the show Lost piss you off that their season finale is so mindfucking that you can't physically wait for September? huh? maybe just me? sorry...

Have you ever looked at online profiles? 75% of them all say "I like to travel!" even though they've never been anywhere outside of the Arby's 2 miles away... Turns out, I *do* like to travel!

In the last 2 years, I've been to New Orleans, Philadelphia, Baltimore, Nashville, Knoxville, Pisa, Florence and Venice... And now, I'm planning my next trip to Boston! My best friend is interning up there, so I can't wait to to go! Watch out, Boston -- you have a lot of competition from Philly -- here we come!

They Might Be Giants, Boy

2006-05-14T07:04:52Z

On Thursday, I drove down to Knoxville to see They Might Be Giants. It was awesome. Sure, this was the 14th time I've seen them, but so? Their shows are literally the happiest moments of my life. And I mean literal in the literal sense, not the figurative that it has come to mean. Their shows are pure bliss and I forget about all of my troubles for 80 minutes. Trust me, this is not hyperbole.

All the Money Money Couldn't Buy

2006-05-08T01:03:50Z

Spent $40 betting on horses yesterday. Came home with $90. Not bad considering I don't know anything about horse racing...

C'mon and Wreck My Car

2006-05-01T22:30:43Z

So, as I mentioned in a previous entry, I ponied up the cash to get on to match.com for a month. After spending 2 weeks of browsing, I decdied that I might as well actually use the e-mail feature and try to talk to some girls. I pick one out and shoot her an e-mail and I was happy to find a reply in my inbox today. Here it is:

"Hi Nick, glad to read from you. I am Nancy and here is a little about me. I am from a family of two. I lost my Dad when I was young. My junior brother is about to write his final exams at the college. I grew up in Goldsboro (MD). Goldsboro is about 50-60 minutes drive from Baltimore. I studied in New Jersey University in Jersey City and I am presently into sales of computer products and accessories. I have numerous clients worldwide, I get them whatever they need as regards computer products and accessories, sometimes get them installed at their respective companies, get paid and I earn my living with it. I have been to places like Frankfurt (Germany), Spain, London and some other interesting countries. My Job gives me the opportunity to travel around the world. I am presently with my Mum in Nigeria to take care of her 'cos she was involved in an auto crash sometimes last week. She is presently on the sick bed in one of the hospitals over here. She came to Nigeria to see one of her clients but unfortunately, the client is nowhere to be found. This is my first time of coming down to Africa, the weather is hot over here. I look forward to reading from you and most importantly, get to meet you. I would have loved to send you some other pics of me but I don't have my digital camera here. Expect them as soon as I'm back. I look forward to seeing yours too as soon as you have the chance. Please email me with your private email address when next you wish to write me 'cos my subscription on match ends today. I hope to delete my profile on match as soon as I get what my heart desires. My email address is [address deleted] @ yahoo dot com. I have to get back to the hospital now and I hope to read from you as soon as you have the chance.
ttyl
H's and K's
Nancy~~~"

Great, I paid $30 just so I could get in better contact with Nigerian scam artists... sigh...

I Tried to Rock and Roll

2006-04-29T04:37:50Z

The other day, someone sent my band's myspace page an e-mail asking where they could purchase a copy of my band's CD. This strokes my ego to no end considering the songs are just a silly little hobby for a friend and me. Too bad we don't have a CD to sell. We've got 8 or 9 songs at some stage of recording development, so I guess it's not out of the question that someday we'll be able to pull a CD together. For now, though, this fan will have to wait...

Oh, did you forget that I had a band? Or, you remembered but you were too lazy to check it out? I'l give you another chance: http://www.myspace.com/rocketkite

It Was Like A Movie On The Cable TV

2006-04-22T05:54:15Z

I'm sure that by now you've heard of "Snakes on a Plane." If not, I'll explain: SoaP is a movie that features... well, um, I think you know by now. This is brilliant marketing. With a more pedestrian title, this movie would die a quick death, but since they went with the "truth in advertising title," it's become an internet phenomenon 4 months before its release. Therefore, I've decided to come up with some movies plots that are ridiculous, but saved by their matter-of-fact, audacious titles. Here goes!

Love at First Sight, but Then Shit Happens, But They Get Together at the End: Long title, I know, but it'll work. Boy meets Girl. They fall in love. Boy does something that is mistaken as heinous. Boy and Girl work it out, reconcile. I'll be upset if this doesn't hit $150 million at least...

Rappers on a Bus: This is my Oscar bid. Citizens of Columbia, South Carolina are forced to face their own racist tendancies when a touring group of gangsta rappers are forced ride public transportation after their tour bus breaks down. Why anyone would be on a local bus for more than 90 minutes is not explained, but it's sure to impress the academy.

Drunks Vs. Potheads: So, there's this one frat that loves to imbibe in spirits. Across campus, you have the frat that only likes ganja. They, of course, hate each other. Naturally, a prank war sparks up. Unfortunately, things tend to go awry due to the fact that everyone is involved is either drunk or stoned. Hilarity ensues. And the Dean is pissed!

Pisa Has A Leaning Tower, Will It Ever Fall?

2006-04-16T04:41:10Z

Pisa wasn't all that interesting, really. Yes, I climbed the famous leaning tower. Scary as shit, by the way. once you're at the end of the staircase, you're about 275 steps up. Fine if you're on the high end, but the leaning side, you start to realize what could happen. Unlike the other towers we climbed, the leaning tower only has the minimum from accidental deaths. there's about 4 feet of railing from the very top (57.6 meter... I'll let you do the math), so it's a little scary.

Being in Pisa was much more like being stranded than the other cities we visted. In Venice and Florence, everyone you came in contact with knew enough English to do their job. But in Pisa, outside of the 5 ft tourist area, no one spoke English at all. We had dinner at a pizzeria, and it was a chore to order dinner... not that I'm complaining, it's interesting trying to work it all out.

so, I'm back in the States, the land of inexpensive Diet Coke!